Disclaimer: This isn't my happiest, most upbeat post. I had an off day, and I hope reading this will inspire some of my readers to pray a little extra for me.
This week, I sent out around ten emails to different missionary families in the countries I'm considering. Very basic, just letting them know I was up for volunteer work for X many months, what my skills were, and if they thought they could use me to please email back more info. I hope the responses I get help me narrow down a lot.
So far, I've gotten back three, and all were an easy 'no'. Some people might be mad they didn't instantly get their neon sign, saying their perfect place was open and waiting, but I'm realistic. I know this won't be a short process of eliminating and praying and thinking.
One response was from Honduras, except that family was still in Mexico finishing language school, so they don't really know what kind of help they'll need yet. However, they were amazingly nice, and forwarded my email to several of their friends already in the field.
One was from Ecuador. The family had to cut their mission work down due to some problems and are coming back to the US on furlough for the fall, so they're just trying to keep themselves busy until then. An added person wouldn't be an asset. They did say if I was open to moving around a little during my stay they might have a spot, so I just sent back a 'Sure!' and I'm waiting on details.
The last was also from Ecuador, and though they were wholly enthusiastic about me coming to volunteer, it was not the place for me. It was a position teaching English at their school, from little kids to adults. They're highly strict about a few living conditions, and I disliked how they laid that out on the table. They also want someone through June, and I have to be back mid-May.
Teaching is definitely not a skill I have. I can assist all day long, but actually having to teach not only scares but frustrates me. I think so differently from other people, I've learned, and usually it's not easy to explain how I think. The thought of having to get up every day, make lesson plans, keep kids occupied for hours with the English language...it makes me a little nauseous. Like more college, in a major I don't like.
My dad feels I shouldn't be so quick to dismiss this one, since it is an open door. I, however, feel that if you don't have a peace about something, then it isn't what you should be doing. God gives us instincts and feelings so we could sense things like that. I'm a very intuitive person when it comes to these things. I want things to not only work out, but feel right too. Like I haven't got a negative feeling yet about volunteering. Just the opposite, I'm more excited and ready to go. And I think wherever I pick I should feel more of that eager, willing to go spirit.
I volunteered so I could go and WORK, be actively involved in ministry, and go to bed at night feeling tired and maybe hot and dirty, but happy I physically accomplished something positive for the day. I'm not picky about what, and I'm not limited either. I speak enough Spanish to converse slowly, and I pick up languages fast being around them. I can pretty much do anything from office work and bookkeeping to medical work, to working with kids and youth, music, cooking, light construction. And if I don't know how to do something, I'm a self-driven enough person to figure it out quick. Being such a diverse person, I figured it'd be easy to find my 'place'. Well, easier said than done.
If I could pick, I'd love a spot where I wasn't doing the same thing every day for the entirety of my stay. I like doing different things, exercising my mind and body in different ways, meeting new people and seeing new places. I know God has the place He wants me to be, and I pray He shows me soon, but I also pray it's some place like that.
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