Jumbled Emotions

This morning, I woke up, got ready, and left my house for the last time in nine months. I loaded two suitcases, a carry-on, and a backpack into the car and my family drove me to the airport. I got on a plane at 2:15 headed for Atlanta and then at 5:30 I'll get on another going to Quito. Bedtime tonight, I'll be in a hotel room in a foreign country by myself for the first time in my life.

So, here's the consensus of my feelings right now:

I'm a little scared about being alone in such a big city and traveling by myself once the Harrisburg team leaves. I've traveled alone before, but just in the US where I'm very comfortable with the language and customs, and never have I been without the very comforting presence of my family in a place as huge as Quito. Just thinking about having to navigate ALL this luggage, taxis, hotel rooms, finding food, finding a cellphone, hoping I can understand the Spanish...can you tell I like to worry ahead? I'm always apprehensive about new things. I used to get so nervous before piano recitals and band try-outs my mom would make me take benadryl or something, so I wouldn't work myself up so bad. I'm much better now as an adult, but something this big is different than having to play piano in front of church or something. I kinda feel naked almost, going into such new, unfamiliar, foreign, different situations without anything but myself and a cartload of suitcases.

I definitely have to work on worrying about control, what things I can control and what things I try to even though I have no way of affecting any outcome. Worry is my stumbling block. Worrying I can do, even if it doesn't help much of anything, you know? So I worry and worry and worry, til I either just drop or something gives. God doesn't like it much, and He usually lets me know that, so He and I are working on it. Slowly slowly slowly.

In other news, I'm actually very much a traveler. I love going to new places, and I'd actually rather fly there than drive. Opposite of my nerves, I'm excited to be going to a country I've never seen before and spending enough time there to actually see a good deal of it on my off-time. Oh I definitely plan to be sightseeing and going as many places as I can while I'm here. Hey, why come all this way and not live it up while I'm here? :) most of all, I want to see the Galapagos Islands. My parents are coming down at Christmas, and they want to see them too, so maybe then? If not, I know Laura plans to be going to as many of these little places as she can too, and maybe on our weekends we can team up and explore Ecuador.

I'm kind of nervous about starting planning lessons and getting ready to begin teaching. Not that I'm scared that it'll be difficult or anything, it's just one of those 'behind door number one...' mysteries still. No idea what to expect yet, so my mind tries to expect everything!


My goals this year:
Obviously exercising is unnessecary to write down. we have quite a hike every day to and from school, so I'm sure I'll come home with killer thighs and calves!

I'm going to attempt to keep a journal of sorts on my blog, pics included. It may not be a post-every-day deal, but I will keep up to date. I know people back home will be reading and wanting to know what I'm up to, but also I know I'll want to be able to look back on it later.

So, until Ecuador, this is Alyssa saying adios, miss you already! :)